I do all that I can, will all that I know, trusting that it is enough!

Vision Board for the non-visual:  Make a Word Board.

Here is mine for November.  I wrote it in the margin of my planner.  So I look at it most days. When I read it, the words speak to me. Some of them send a feeling of electricity through my body. Not always the same words each day. I

November is Cheerfulness Month.

Guidance, Clarity, Gratitude, Beauty, Fruitful Ideas, Breath, Laughter, Joy, Direction, Ease, Flexibility, Companionship,  Emotional Support, Wealth, Travel, Spontaneity and Alignment flow to me easily from expected and unexpected sources.

Fast forward to being single, and over 50, and caring a lot less about what anyone else thinks about what I do. I was feeling like I needed some exercise, and mentioned to a friend, that I really wish I could go out dancing, but I couldn’t.  ( It just feels so good, it oxygenates every cell in your body and just feels amazing. ) He said, why can’t you?  That got me to thinking.  Why can’t I.  Who’s permission was I waiting to get? Obviously, I was the only one holding myself back.

I still didn’t want to go into bars alone and deal with drunk guys wanting to pick me up afterwards, (note to self, find some girlfriends that love to dance) so I decided there wasn’t anything holding me back from cranking some good dance music up in my own living room and getting some exercise!  I apologized to my teenage son in advance, (tongue in cheek, that is, for having to watch his Mom look like a lunatic) and had to ask him for help to load some songs into my phone, always good to have a teenager in the house to teach you to run all the technology!  With a few songs built into my YouTube Library. I was ready to go!

Now, I frequently crank up the dance tunes, oxygenate my blood, feel like a 16 year old kid and get some amazing exercise.  Yes, I gave myself Permission!   And I continue to again and again!!

So when I say that November is “Cheerfulness Month,”  it is coming more from the inside! From my internal knowing that I must continuously look for and find reasons to be grateful. Some days the things aren’t outwardly remarkable, like Tuesday, when the clerk at Walmart, not only knew how to open my battery-powered remote garage door opener, but knew where to find the right battery, found it for me and put it in!! And it worked for the first time in 8 months  8 months of me not knowing what was wrong with the darn thing!  Who knew the fix was so easy!  It cost less than 2 dollars!  But the helpfulness of this random salesclerk made my evening!  He went out of his way to help me, above and beyond his job.   And Thursday, I started making a list of things to be grateful for.  On my list is: The soft, thick blanket on my bed that feels like security on dark, snowy nights,  dark Chocolate with almonds and cherries, the soup my grandmother would made with kidney beans, escarole, rice and lots of garlic.  I make it sometimes when I need to remember her, standing at the stove, stirring a big pot.  Always intent on loving her family by feeding us!  When a particular day brings stress, such as making plans to go on a first date, while wondering if  my dating is stressing out my teenage son, and wrestling with what is best in the big picture, for both of us, it helps to have a way to focus on positives.  Moments when we have a sense of inner guidance about what is right.  Tuning in to that small voice that know that even though my son battles with anxiety and depression, letting it consume us both is not an option.   When I notice and appreciate things that go right, it helps me focus on productive energy.

Yes, it does help that I know that our brains are wired to respond to our emotions, feelings of gratitude actually shower your brain with “feel good” chemicals.  And the opposite is also true.  Focusing on negative emotions will flood your brain and your system with stress hormones that bring on the fight or flight response that sends cortisol through your system, activating a whole series of biochemical reactions that cut off important things like digestion, and even social attachment mechanisms.  In actual survival situations, properly digesting your dinner isn’t top priority if it means you will be eaten by an oncoming grizzly bear!  But in our present world, where grizzly bears are few and far between, we still have to work with our human bodies that responds to stress in centuries-old habitual ways.  So we have to use our more recently developed intellect to release emotions of anger, guilt and fear.  The best ways I am finding for that are breathing deeply, shaking out every body part and I am going to try a coach’s suggested method of hitting a pillow and yelling.  I am really reluctant to do that.  But I trust that he is telling me something very useful.  It is my hesitation and reservations for showing any emotion that has kept me from doing that up to now.  This week is my week to try to deal with releasing old pent-up fears.

Wish me luck!

I want to know what methods you have found useful to deal with and release bottled up emotions.  What have you experienced, how has it benefited you?

Life bites sometimes!  I am the mother of a teenage son that has bouts with anxiety and depression.  Yikes!!  How do I help him? How is he doing today?  So many unknowns.  Worries about things I can’t control.  Some days, it hangs over both of us like a black cloud.

So this is my, and our journey in, through and over the daily events, joys, struggles, wins and losses, in taking the masks off, facing the realities and finding answers about how life works in the process.

What can you expect here?  Affirmations to help you know that you aren’t alone, sharing every piece of information that I have found useful to either my son, myself, or others with anxiety and depression issues.  Not everyone with anxiety and depression has the exact same issue going on.  Different brain wiring!   To read more about this, check out the books and YouTube videos by Doctor Daniel Amen.  Narrowing down what is happening in your unique situation is important.  Real life experiences, of making it through a day, of looking toward the future from my point of view and from my son’s.  A chance to share.

As I talk about my circumstances, and read and learn about the issues we face, I find that we are one family among many.  You that are also facing similar circumstances have your experiences to share.  All the victories, all the helpful remedies, every piece of helpful advice,  we want to hear it all from you and share it!  Every person that is helped to live with a little more joy adds to the ripple in the pond.   We are casting a stone.  Sending waves of knowledge, shared experience and victories.  We are all a part of the whole, lifting each other up!  We are on a journey, an upward spiral!  Moving from wherever we are today toward, peace, joyfulness and a unique expression of our best selves!  Celebrating life, inviting in more JOY!  Living fully, becoming more whole!